Today, I invite you into my mind. If you accept, you might regret it. So much is going on in there, you might get overwhelmed, or mad, or jealous. This chaotic brain activity even has a name: Monkey Mind. Although, its description appears a bit harsh to define my condition. Thank you for supplying me with the correct term, Peta, when I mentioned this busy-bee thought syndrome in my last writing update. Luckily, those mulled-over and constantly-sprouting concepts aren’t all writing-related. That being said, the idea for this post formed while I was in the shower, head-writing it. ????
Pensive position
Some background information to help understand our conundrums in regards to… our future:
- Mark and I met the end of 2004 and have been nomads ever since (me 1.5 years prior to that).
- With two big dogs, we attempted a sailing adventure, which failed after nine months of prep.
- The four of us traveled throughout Mexico and Central America in an RV for one year instead.
- This was followed by three months in-limbo at a friend’s place in Texas, contemplating a move to Belize, a country that pleased and attracted us.
- But, Mark’s dream to go sailing persisted: we lived in a tent and Toyota Tacoma with our two dogs for two months, in search of the perfect catamaran. We found Irie in Annapolis, Maryland.
- An eight-year sailing journey brought us from the US to the Caribbean to the South Pacific.
- After selling Irie in Tahiti, we didn’t want to settle but needed a break from our travels. The solution: house and pet sitting; frequent changes of scenery and the conveniences of a house.
- Until we got itchy feet again and bought our current campervan, Zesty. Overland adventures continued, in combination with welcome breaks, house sitting.
- We adopted Maya in June 2019 and house sitting was not an option anymore. We preferred our life on the road by then, so it all made sense to travel full-time again.
- Then, Covid happened and we got stuck in a room above the garage in a city for many months.
Like many people, we are trying to figure out what’s next. Unlike other people, this was already a debate for us since the start of this year and we don’t have our own place, comfortable living quarters, neighborhood, and familiar environment to ride this out. We are antsy. Our bodies need hikes in different surroundings. Our minds crave the peace of nature. Our entire selves thrive when exploring the world, discovering new territories, expanding our horizons. Our dog requires romps in the woods or jaunts on the beach. We are going stir-crazy – how long can two adults live, work, cook, sleep, talk, rest, wash up, clean dishes, and discuss the future in one room? What is the solution? Consider the options!
1. Remain in this room until further notice
Not really an option. When your favorite place is a decades-old sofa bed that causes backaches, when you’ve been doing dishes in a basin wedged in a bathroom sink with a fixed tap (bending over into the shower to let those dishes dry on a rack and tossing the water down the toilet to not plug any drains) for four months, when your dog leads you along the usual walking route, when you know the street names in the neighborhood by heart, and when you can’t see the people or do the things that are usually the reasons for these visits to Massachusetts, it’s time to leave.
2. Find a nest to call home
After 17 years on the road and the water, is it finally time to put down roots? To find a small abode to call home? A comfortable base to return to and rest up in between travels?
Pros: Aaaaaah, hot, pressurized showers whenever desired, unlimited electricity, water, and internet, a place to finally display my souvenirs, my first couch in twenty years, a vegetable garden (?), buying furniture (!), decorating our own place, potential rental income, a refuge to finally receive national and international guests, comfort, comfort, comfort.
Cons: Very expensive, the need to find “real” jobs, bigger to clean, familiarity and routine (yikes), no guarantee we’d like the area, material goods will collect (double yikes), Mark and I have never lived like this, a scary idea, upkeep, extra work and responsibilities, lack of freedom.
Sunset from Irie in Grenada
3. Go sailing on a catamaran again
What??? I see our close friends and trusted family members frown. Did we forget the hellish final year on Irie? Are we really ready to dive into non-stop boat projects, a challenging lifestyle, and spending tons of money in upkeep again?
Leopard 38 catamaran at a dock (Photo courtesy YachtWorld)
Pros: Privacy, beautiful surroundings, the presence of wildlife, peaceful environments, a great community, we have the experience, possible good deals right now, Mark can fix most everything, no running a business this time, Maya is adventurous, agile, and loves boats.
Cons: High purchase cost, relatively high expenses (for us), bad taste in our mouths because of how our previous sailing adventure ended, we prefer exploring new countries instead of revisiting old ones, long trips are no fun, watching the weather forecast every minute of the day, discomfort, lack of resources, seasickness, harder to return to elderly parents.
4. Change gears and swap campers
For a while now, Mark and I have had the intention to ship a camper to South America and discover that continent overland – a multiple-year adventure. Adopting Maya was not a deterrent to that plan. Having a dog only put our international house sitting desires on hold. Our current van is not suitable for such an expedition. We’ve researched vehicle options and there is a lot to consider. I won’t bore you with those details; particular truck campers are deemed the best option for us. Yes, they are even smaller than 19-foot Zesty!
Pros: new adventures, new countries, new experiences, new friends to be made, exciting, affordable, amazing destinations, learning Spanish, eating exotic foods, … it feels like it’s been forever since we set foot abroad and immersed ourselves in a different culture.
Cons: an exhausting way of life we might not be ready for yet, selling Zesty, finding and buying the right camper, leaving family and all we know behind, lots of prep work, will we be welcome?
5. Continue this lifestyle
This feels right – do what we know, don’t make things more complicated, stick to “plan” which is no plan – and is probably what we should and will do. Whenever our time in Newburyport is up (job-depending), we point Zesty’s nose westward and continue our vanlife journey.
Pros: easy, familiar, lots to see and do in the US, Maya enjoys it, we own our vehicle and gear, expenses are in line with our expectations, our campervan has been our home for years now.
Cons: we are ready for something new and different, we can’t visit friends along the way right now, the longer we travel in Zesty, the lower her resell value, working from the road is difficult, we often crave more comfort and space, and bugs, cold, heat, and humidity are bothersome.
And then there’s Covid, and all its consequences and constrictions, to consider…
[Before you define us as spoiled, entitled, and/or lucky creatures to have this many options, please realize that we are not much different from most of you. Yes, we are very fortunate to have been born in Western, “free-spirited” countries (we gratefully admit that), but that’s where our “luck” stops. Throughout our lives, Mark and I have made decisions (and sacrifices) to become nomads. This blog post is not a complaint or a rant; it’s merely a glimpse into our lifestyle and our discussion points of the last months.]
What do you think we should do and why? Which option would you choose for yourself? Do you have other suggestions?
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July 15, 2020 at 12:05
I read this with zeal, to hear so many possibilities for a life lived to it’s fullest. And then came your last line–“define us as spoiled, entitled, and/or lucky creatures”. What??? That never once came to mind. My thoughts: you showing how to live a minimalist life, one that’s good for the planet with a low impact on all life around you. You doing what you say (I’m assuming you are interesting in a small footprint–just my conclusion from your writing). I downsize my footprint but haven’t the courage to take it as far as you. I love how you make it all work, always paying attention to the goal.
Lots of good options. I shall continue reading (as though a riveting novel) to see what happens next.
July 15, 2020 at 16:26
Hi Jacqui!
The reason I mentioned the “us being spoiled or entitled or lucky” remark is because we have come across people who have called us that. Of course, I know – or I should have known – that none of my regular readers label us that way. 🙂 I contemplated rephrasing that last paragraph after your comment, but then the comments wouldn’t make sense anymore. Plus, this blog (unlike most) went through my husband’s censorship and he left that passage in, haha.
Yes, we live a minimalistic life with a small environmental footprint. We love it. Honestly, those things come natural, though. I haven’t known it any different way. I’ve always been in awe of and in sync with nature and spent my money “wisely” in order to follow adventure.
I’m happy about your zeal and interest in following (and continue to do so) our journey! Sorry for being a bit blunt in that last paragraph. 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 12:09
Great post. You have the same adventurous spirit as us. We sailed on our 42 foot sailboat for 3 years. The best 3 years of our lives. Lived and traveled in 2 different RV’s for over 2 years and now traveling Expats based in Colombia.
We have also thought about getting another boat and looked at the pros and cons like you. We decided not to.
We have a plan to see as much in this part of the world and then head to Spain and be based there to see that part of the planet and an RV will be in the picture there.
We think getting an RV and shipping it to South America is a great plan. The cost of living and traveling here is so affordable. We know folks who have done it and loved it. Just buy the best tires you can afford!!
There is a lot to see and explore here, once this Coved-19 is under control.
You made some great decisions with your adventures so far, keep reaching for them! Cheers!
July 15, 2020 at 16:34
Hi John and Susan!
I think we are following in your tracks, as we’d love to become expats somewhere, one day. It might be our first house together and it will be in a country different than Belgium or the US. How fitting.
I so would like to meet you both and I have had that desire ever since Lisa pointed me in your direction. We only visited Colombia briefly (Santa Marta area, Cartagena, and some islands around the corner from there); there’s much more to explore in your area for us as well. One day, we will swing by with our new camper. 🙂
And, Europe with a small RV (and then onward to Asia and maybe Africa) is on our mental list as well. We’re very interested in checking out Portugal by the way, another attractive expat destination. It sounds like you two are not slowing down yet either!
I wish these “decisions” came easy for us, but they usually don’t and it’s the gut that guides us one way or another. Problem is that nothing pulls us at the moment, but I’m sure Covid has something to do with that.
July 15, 2020 at 19:21
It’s always good to listen to your gut. Since you asked for our thoughts, I’d say don’t make any major changes now, which I believe is what your gut is telling you too. Enjoy your van, take it where you can. When it’s time for a change you will feel it. Covid must be more under control before you undertake any major expense.
July 16, 2020 at 11:03
You read our gut, Leslie. Better safe than sorry – a mantra we have lived by, especially on our boat. The current attraction to change things up would be the potential deals that might be available on our preferred catamaran. But, we don’t even know that until we’d place offers. And we are certainly not ready for that! We will see what happens – our most common mantra. 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 12:26
I enjoyed this trip down memory lane, Liesbet. The photos are terrific, too. I would never say you and Mark are “entitled” or “spoiled” far from it! Wherever you decide to go, I’ll be with you…from the safety of my computer, of course. All of our puzzles and TP would never fit in Zesty or on your boat!
July 15, 2020 at 12:41
P.S. How could you leave that incredible desk? I love it!
July 15, 2020 at 16:54
That desk is amazing and similar to yours, right? But, it isn’t mine. If it would be, I’d fill all those little drawers and nooks and crannies and compartments with personal goodies. And, notebooks. 🙂 Now, most of it is empty.
July 15, 2020 at 18:12
Mine doesn’t have nearly as many nooks and crannies! Empty? That’s so sad! 🙂
July 16, 2020 at 10:57
All this talk about this fantastic desk had me put “dibs” on it with my in-laws, but apparently, one of Mark’s nephews already claimed it. My mother-in-law had a walk through the house years ago with all her grandkids, as they pointed out which pieces of furniture or kitchenware they’d like to keep whenever their grandparents move or pass away. Mark and I were never considered, since we don’t have a place to put any of it!
July 16, 2020 at 17:54
Oh darn! But is the nephew a writer? That desk should go to you! 🙂 Just between me and you.
July 18, 2020 at 11:50
The nephew is not a writer (on the contrary, he’s an engineer), but he is a great guy, who cares about the environment more than anyone else I know – at least without any hypocrisy – and will have the space for it! 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 16:41
You make me smile, Jill! But, you’re right, all your precious belongings wouldn’t fit in any place I’ve ever lived, haha. Just think about all those notebooks! There isn’t even room for mine.
I figured I’d mix things up a bit with the photos, as the sailing scene was so different than our current overland adventures. I actually picked photos that were still scattered on my computer for some reason (my thousands of sailing photos have been archived on hard drives), as it would have been too hard and time consuming to go through those.
Thank you for being there and for always putting me in a good mood!
July 15, 2020 at 18:10
<3
July 15, 2020 at 18:13
Okay…that is supposed to be a heart!
July 16, 2020 at 10:58
Not sure why it didn’t show up as one. Let me try it right here… <3
July 16, 2020 at 10:58
Huh. Blame WordPress. But, I knew what you meant. 🙂 (This emoji shows up.)
July 16, 2020 at 17:55
🙂
July 16, 2020 at 10:54
🙂
July 15, 2020 at 12:33
Hi Liesbet, I would never think that you and Mark are spoiled, entitled or “lucky creatures”. Whoever would think bad things would think something bad no matter what.
On the contrary, I like that you two (no three, including Maya) follow your own path. You do live a different life style than most, and that is amazing (your book will be filled with all kinds of interesting stories and experiences that most folks never even dream of).
Life can be filled with so many difficult decisions at times. But we do the best we can, with what we know and where we are in our life. Not to mention our dreams, and aspirations.
I do enjoy hearing your thoughts, and how you come to your final decision.
If you decided to go out of the country would there be restrictions with Maya? Would she have to be quarantined?
July 15, 2020 at 16:52
Hi Lea!
I added that paragraph about the entitlement sentiments, because there are plenty of people who would see us that way. Granted, those people don’t know us and react to the situation they observe on the surface. I hope I didn’t offend any of my readers by adding that note to the post.
Thank you for your support and interest in our lifestyle and choices. My book will be a pretty compelling read. 🙂 And, I’ll have to compose some sequels too.
Mark and I have traveled abroad extensively with dogs – overland and on our boat. The rules for “temporarily importing” your dog are different everywhere. But, we do our research and follow the rules. Most countries require a current health certificate and proof of a rabies vaccination. Other countries require more, like a titer for the rabies shot, meaning proof that the shot took. Some countries request the dogs being microchipped. Or a Lyme disease test.
There are still countries where Maya would have to be quarantined, but not many and we wouldn’t go there. Usually, the agriculture department pays us a visit at border crossings – for the dog(s) – on top of immigration and customs. So, the only restrictions would be if she’s not allowed in at all (there are Caribbean islands fitting this bill) or if she has to be quarantined. But, there are enough countries left, where we are all welcome. 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 12:39
Hi Liesbet! As you know I’m a big “planner” and always figuring the pros and cons (and tradeoffs) of nearly every decision I make–I tend to think it is SMART! And when you think about it, if a person is paying attention we all have a wide variety of choices when it comes to our future. And even if we decide just to continue what we are doing, it is doing it with awareness and mindfulness rather than lulling ourself with routine. I would NEVER try to tell you both which choices you make. A rightsized life means you pick and choose what fits you all the best…and besides, you can ALWAYS change your mind if one isn’t working the way you want. Regardless of what you choose…you know your friends will enjoy following along your adventures! ~Kathy
July 15, 2020 at 17:00
Hi Kathy!
You must suffer from Monkey Mind as well, when weighing all those options and all those decisions on a daily basis! 🙂 Most people’s lives are more straightforward than ours and I have often said that fewer choices aren’t necessarily a bad thing.
I find all this thinking and debating and making pro and con lists exhausting. In general, we don’t do this and we go with our gut. Since this is another possibly major direction in our lives, we are doing a bit more effort to figure it out, but in the end, we will follow our gut again, whenever it makes a decision. 🙂
I love it that you’re still interested in our adventures. I hope we can figure out soon what our rightsized path involves. One thing is for sure with us: there’s never a dull moment.
July 15, 2020 at 13:18
Well, I have lots of thoughts for you – especially since we’ve thought if many things ourselves.
We think we’d like to go sailing again some day but don’t want to do it before we have more money. As you know sailing can be expensive and a lot of work. And right now there is COVID-19. We just visited a friend who was sailing in the Bahamas this past winter. Things got really restrictive to the point he wasn’t allowed to leave his boat. This was especially bad because he has a dog. Since things don’t look like they are going to get better anytime soon he doesn’t think he will be sailing this next season.
We also talk about getting another rig. We want high clearance 4WD. I really like the van layout so I’m leaning towards another van that we will build out ourselves. When will this happen? I don’t know. We now have 100,000 miles plus on Ballena Blanca. I think this coming winter might be the time to make the switch – but we haven’t seriously discussed it. And of course building out a can means leaving the road for a while.
If I were you, I’d put the idea of traveling South America on hold for a while. I’m sure there are different travel restrictions for each country due to COVID-19. Traveling anywhere can be difficult right now, especially in other countries.
You guys take very good care of Zesty and I know you take your investment in her very seriously. If you are going to get another vehicle right now may be a good time to do it. Not only will you be selling her in good shape but according to the news more people are jumping into the traveling life.
If you do decide to get another vehicle you might want to consider the differences you might miss in another set-up. Zesty is a great rig for entertaining. Although there is always hanging around with friends outside, you can’t do that when it is raining and you are meeting up with friends in a Walmart parking lot!
We talk about buying property too. This winter we were kind of talking seriously about buying rental property that we could also use as a home base. I was thinking that it would be a better investment for our money. But I always hated being a landlord and I know it will take a good deal of research to find a good investment in a place that suits our needs. And is now a good time to be making an investment like that? I don’t know.
I feel our nomadic life and the changes we have made have just sort of happened – the right things appeared at the right time. Sailing led to house sitting, house sitting led to wanting a van, a broken van led to the van we have now, a broken boat led to our fulltime traveling lifestyle.
My advice is if you are ready to put the time and energy into it, change your vehicle and plan to do more roaming about this country. Once the world opens back up you will be ready to go to South America or anywhere else. And while you’re roaming about you might find a piece of property or another opportunity to push you in another direction.
July 16, 2020 at 10:35
Hi Duwan,
Thank you for your thoughts and insights. How I wish we could discuss all this in person, as I know you can relate and you understand. We’re pretty much in the same situation. And, we both realize that non-stop travel can be exhausting.
I have some thoughts for you as well: sailing again, when you have more money? I thought you retired? Haha. And, I remember your desire for a higher clearance 4×4 van. With Greg and your skills, it would be a fun and rewarding project to build one out yourselves. Once you find a nice base again. Maybe another summer of house sitting in Cabbagetown?
We’ve also heard from friends getting stuck on (and off) their boats. Who knows what the right approach is. We would definitely have more space and peace on a catamaran, but – isn’t this interesting – that option does appear to be the most expensive. I guess because there’s always a lot that breaks in the marine environment and boats lose value as opposed to houses.
We are fully aware of the pros (and cons) about Zesty and we really like him a lot. To be honest, just the thought of selling the van makes my heart skip a beat. We especially love how well the space is used. Getting a truck camper makes you lose a lot of space, like the front seats that swivel… And, you need to go outside to enter the rig. Yeah, we would miss Zesty. Maybe we’ll consider building out our next van as well, as higher clearance is what we’re after. 🙂
I think you’re right about staying in this country for a bit longer. And I like the thought of stumbling across a place we like to potentially settle. Although, and we mentioned this to you before, it hasn’t happened yet in all those years on the road and the water. There is nowhere in particular that we’ve found “perfect” to settle. But you never know.
Similar to you, our paths in the past just appeared in front of us, without too much planning. We like it that way, but sometimes a bit of “guidance” helps. 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 13:51
I think you are wise to stay in this country for the next year or two. This Covid thing isn’t going away anytime soon, unfortunately. My crystal ball says the next 12 months will probably get real ugly on all fronts … health, financial, and civil unrest. I really hope I’m wrong! Wishing you safe travels wherever your hearts take you. Re: spoiled, entitled, or lucky? No way! Since I’ve had the privilege of meeting you in person, I’d describe you and Mark as hardworking, honest, minimalists just wanting to live an adventurous life ????
July 16, 2020 at 10:40
Oh, Ingrid!
I hope your crystal ball is wrong. Yet, despite the high death toll, I did fear worse in regards to the economy (which seems warped at the moment) and even civil unrest thus far. I guess we should brace ourselves. But, if a vaccine becomes available, the future will look brighter. Sound advice about hanging around the US for a while longer.
Thank you for the compliment. I’m so happy to be surrounded by a supportive and awesome group of people here! And, in real life as well, when personal connections are made and mutual understanding ensues.
July 15, 2020 at 15:18
AH, “a nomad’s monkey mind” is definitely different to a regular “monkey mind” as your post so eloquently demonstrates. There are always SO many different things to consider, so many different life trajectories and choices.
Thanks for the shout out to our blog. Appreciate that….
You two are the last people any one could think of as being “spoilt or entitled” quite the contrary, as others have already pointed out. Sculpting one’s life, as opposed to staying within one framework for years or decades, is a lot of work. Yes, the adventures and discoveries make it all well worth while, but there is a lot of energy and time that goes into making the choices and decisions. One of the interesting things about COVID is how we have been in one place for going on four months now… a record for us. At this point in time we would be thinking about our next adventure and what kind of stops along the way we might take. One of the benefits of staying put in one place, a very comfortable place I might add, is that I have been able to use a juicer and a blender and an oven and that has had its benefits. That said, I am eager to explore more of Mexico.
Sounds like numbers four or five might be the best fit with five being the “simpler” easier of the two obviously. Very thought provoking. They only solution to coming up with the answer is to quiet the monkey mind and do as much mediating or walking in nature and your heart will give you the right direction. In your gut you will just know the answer….
Peta
July 16, 2020 at 10:49
I guess there is a variety of Monkey Minds. 🙂 I might possess a few.
Isn’t it nice to be stuck in a comfortable place for a while? I totally get your joy (and not taking for granted) of the amenities at your rental house. And, so much space you have there too. And an enriching, fun, and like-minded community. I’m sure you’re happy to add a few more months to that mix. Yet, I understand the desire to explore again, of course. It will happen.
We’ve thought and talk a lot about you and Ben. Particularly the way your paths in life “line up”. You totally trust in fate and believe something will always work out. Directions (and decisions) happen at the exact right moment for you and something positive always awaits. You guys inspire us and help us in understanding those ways and believing in them. The gut is king!
Sometimes, like when I composed this post, we wished there was a call from somewhere, a feeling of “this is right”, a pointer from the gut. Maybe there is – each time we consider the options, we circle back to keeping Zesty and roaming the US a bit longer until something else “comes up”. Maybe patience is the name of the Covid game! 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 15:58
Absolutely nothing in your post makes one think “spoiled” or entitled. Luck happens with hard work and allowing love to shine into your lives. You and Mark have done that, so whatever decision you make, it will be the RIGHT one. xo
July 16, 2020 at 10:52
I’ve often heard the sentiment “There is no wrong decision”; there might be a second part to that quote I forgot. You are right, Pam, any which direction we go, it will work out somehow and bring us the joy and adventure we crave. It’s all just hard to imagine right now. Thanks for the love! 🙂
July 15, 2020 at 21:27
Wow, so many choices… and I bet there are a few you haven’t listed… or may, thought of. It will be fun to see which way you go. This whole COVID thing has thrown us all for a loop, but most especially people like you who don’t have a permanent address. Obviously I don’t have a crystal ball but I imagine this will be with us for a while. And, unless we get some good leadership (fingers crossed) who can follow science and inspire the people to comply with simple protective measures, who knows. Long way of saying that your options for visiting other countries might be limited for a while. Whatever you and Mark decide, I’m sure it will be an adventure!
July 16, 2020 at 11:09
You know us well, Janis and we certainly share your heeding of caution and your political views. The entire year pretty much boils down to a “loss” some way or another and a “waiting game”. Maybe it’s not a bad thing to let things settle and take it easy for a while. Kind of hard to do for people who “need” to feel purpose and achieve. It’s all an adventure too and you’re right, with us (and definitely with the addition of Maya), life will NEVER be boring. The three of us went for a walk in nature the other day and our sweet, cute girl managed to pin down an adolescent deer! We managed to save it unharmed. Being stuck in a room above the garage in a vibrant harbor town is as mellow as it will ever get!
July 15, 2020 at 21:59
My curent vote is Option #5. Ultimately, I know whatever you choose, or whereever you find yourselves, will be exactly where you should be!
July 16, 2020 at 11:11
You have a way of saying it right and instilling confidence in us (and others), Donna! Happy to have you along for the (virtual) ride!
July 15, 2020 at 22:10
Wow, lots of options! I wouldn’t even try to guess which one is best for you. I’m a homebody so none of the nomadic options appeal to me personally, but maybe you don’t need to make a permanent decision right away. If you keep Zesty and tour the States a little more, you can still make the decision to do any (or all) of the other things after the world finds its “new normal” post-pandemic. And if things take a turn for the worse in the short term, you can still retreat to Massachusetts. But that’s just me and my need for security talking… 😉
July 16, 2020 at 11:16
Having a comfortable home and being a homebody for a year or so, sounds more and more attractive as our years progress, Diane. But, when we really think it through, we can find enough arguments to postpone that desire for comfort and settlement. It’s all about the right balance, probably. That’s why the house sitting/vanlife combo worked like a charm. But, no regrets. Maya adds to our life and creates a different kind of adventure. Plenty of options, indeed, and they will still be there once things settle down. I always appreciate your reasoning and thoughts.
And, yes, Massachusetts will be here for us, at least a few more years. We think and hope… But, I thought that about my home country as well. Not possible to return there now! 🙁
July 15, 2020 at 22:16
We have a similar lifestyle and we have had the word “entitled” thrown our way more than once. Just because we think outside the box, people don’t understand our way of thinking. The whole Covid thing really hasn’t changed our lifestyle very much and I think some people are offended by that.
We have been traveling the United States by RV since re-entering from Mexico back near the beginning of Covid at the end of March. It is the most Covid-free existence you could have… boondocking wherever we go, and staying away from people as much as humanly possible. The only time we even come close is grocery shopping and getting fuel.
I like any option that doesn’t include boating. Between my fear of drowning and the old joke about a boat being a hole in the water into which you throw money, I’ll stick with land lubber options.
July 16, 2020 at 13:48
Hello Kevin and Ruth!
Nice to read that your lifestyle hasn’t changed too much. That mirrors what other nomadic RV-friends of ours have noticed, other than the grocery store visits and the desire to stay away from people even more than usual. 🙂 These experiences and observations make us confident that we can pull it off to travel within the US (hopefully further afield north and south soon as well), once we leave our confines in Massachusetts. Like you, we most always boondock, so we’re looking forward to that.
I’m sure you know what it feels like to be called entitled, spoiled, or lucky. (Or how about the presumption that only rich people can travel, which was assumed during my early and young years of travel.) We’ve heard that sentiment a lot, but mostly from strangers or acquaintances – the “lucky” part from friends as well.
The landlubbers options attract us the most right now, as that “hole in the water in which you throw money” is still too fresh in our minds and memories. By the way, that’s not an old joke but reality. 🙂
July 16, 2020 at 01:43
It is so difficult. We are also in the situation of ‘what next’. It’s hard to make any decision right now because there are so many unknowns – and this would be a hard decision under normal circumstances. It’s also such a big one! I also feel antsy – although incredibly grateful that we have a place to be, it’s just not my usual life. I find myself fighting against it a bit, but at the same time I’m trying to appreciate it for what it is and there are so many things to enjoy. It’s an adventure of a different kind. The only thing I feel is right, is not to make a hasty decision. Try to ‘quiet’ yourself, and you will kind of know what your next step should be, and when to take it. I think you’ll still have questions, there is almost no certainty in life, but in your heart of hearts you’ll feel what to do. Good luck, and enjoy the process!
July 16, 2020 at 13:53
Hi Trace!
I think that side-effect of extra uncertainty right now makes these decisions harder, indeed. Things you could count on before – like jumping on a plane anywhere or returning to your home country any time – are taken out of the equation. And, when those little securities were the only bullet proof “ways out” of any situation have disappeared, life becomes a tad trickier.
Seeing everything as an adventure, like you and I do, seems to be the best approach during these unprecedented times. Thanks for the pointers and I hope you guys figure out what to do soon as well. In the meantime, enjoy the wonderful comforts and conveniences of a home base. Have fun making plans and dreaming a bit… 🙂
July 16, 2020 at 02:32
We just went through a period of similar questioning about what to do and decided to just stick with what we have been doing. There is just too much unknown right now to make a huge change. Of course, being on the road may get tough again soon, but we’re just not ready to commit to anything else at this point. I say, give it a couple months and see how things shake out before committing to something and then feeling stuck.
July 16, 2020 at 13:56
Maybe it was one of your last posts that unconsciously triggered this post of mine! We’ve been a bit on the same track with our thoughts these last months… There is something to be said for “waiting things out” and sticking to what we are all doing, since nothing else can be predicted to be right (or wrong). As of now, it seems like we will stay put for another couple of months anyway, so we can certainly re-assess then. As long as we’re out of MA before the fall!!!
July 16, 2020 at 07:48
I’m not going to be of any help here because I’ve always believed that asking for help doesn’t always help relieve the pressure life often throws at us. In fact, the advice and help we get can often make the situation even more confusing and make the problem look even worse.
Far better to go with your gut-feeling and if you both have that same feeling, then that’s the answer. However, if you both have different feelings to what to do, then talk about it until you either come up with a solution, or you have to have a third-party make the decision for you. That third-party should be somebody you both trust and who knows both of you well.
If it were me asking the questions in this post, I’d know what I would do, but we’re all different and, whilst hearing a different point-of-view can sometimes hold the answer, I’ve always gone with my gut-feeling on something. I can’t remember a time where it’s let me down.
I look forward to hearing the outcome. Sorry I couldn’t be of any help, Liesbet.
July 16, 2020 at 14:04
Hi Hugh!
Thanks for your contribution to the conversation. Yes, we are all very different creatures and I KNOW which option you would pick. 🙂 I might pick it one day as well, or at least temporarily. As of now, we will keep things easy and straightforward, until we get another bout of enthusiasm and impulsiveness into our heads, haha. You know, when we are stuck or in limbo, it’s not unusual to trick our minds into fast decisions to change our situation, or to jump into an opportunity that might not have sounded attractive any other time.
I like your take on the “gut feeling” in regards to one of us or both of us. Right now, we couldn’t be more on the same page. Hence this post. Yet, we each secretly hope that the other has an overpowering desire to follow one route or the other. That hasn’t happened yet. In our relationship the effect of vetoing something or strongly desiring something has always been valued and respected, but has rarely happened. I guess that means we are a good team. 🙂
I have been in the situation where asking for help led to more confusion, as everyone – of course – has their own opinion about a book title, better cover, better blurb, where to go, what to do… My asking here was more of a conversation starter and because I’m curious about other people’s thoughts on the matter – in regards to us for the people who know us, or in regards to themselves. It has been an insightful, helpful, and entertaining thread. 🙂
July 19, 2020 at 07:03
Good, I’m glad to hear it, Liesbet. I think many couples secretly hope that the other will make the decision because making decisions can be such a big game-player, especially when it comes to life changing events. However, usually, a well-matched couple are usually on the same decision route.
It’s horrifying to hear the news of the continuing number of infections in your part of the world. Whatever the outcome in the questions you asked, I hope you both stay safe until those numbers dramatically decline.
Take care.
July 19, 2020 at 14:16
Thanks, Hugh!
July 16, 2020 at 09:37
You and Mark are certainly counting the cost, so to speak, with all the listings of pros and cons. That alone would tame the monkey mind. These observations stand out:”Our minds crave the peace of nature,” + I know you both have wanderlust, compelled to explore.
I believe you are smart to stay put until you believe you should move on. Sometimes circumstances you never dreamed possible present themselves. A quote from Thoreau just popped into my mind: “I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of [his/her] dreams, and endeavors to live the life which [s/he] imagined, [s/he] will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Something to think about! 😉
July 16, 2020 at 14:14
Hello Marian!
I feel like we are often making our life and our decisions look easy and incredible – amazing photos and fun experiences would promote that idea. So, once in a while, I like to get deeper into our thought processes and travel decisions. And, I LOVE input from my readers.
You are actually right about taming that monkey mind as ever since I created and posted this blog (I know, it has only been a mere 48 hours), I have not thought about our conundrums and we haven’t talked about it anymore. I think we both realize that we should “do our time” here first and come up with a direction that works then, more than likely, taking Zesty West again. That’s where our hearts belong.
Great quote! I have no idea how your memory is so impeccable! Surprises (can) lurk around every corner, indeed. 🙂
July 16, 2020 at 14:35
;-D
July 16, 2020 at 20:02
Liesbet, I can definitely see how this is a conundrum. By now you know who you are and what you enjoy and what allows you to thrive. I also realize ‘indecision’ is very stressful. You are obviously a writer all of your life, so thinking on paper helps clarify some of your thoughts. You and Mark are also very thoughtful people. Therefore, even though you say “no plan” you always have some sort of a Plan A, B, C.
A difficult decision. Yet, a few words stand out “feels right.” That gut feeling when you know you are on the right path. We are living in very unusual circumstances right now. Possibly, waiting a little longer and The Universe will help give you the answer. Just the act of writing this post has set the wheels in motion. Just a thought. ????
July 18, 2020 at 11:56
Erica, you are so wise and thoughtful!
Yes, writing things down has ALWAYS helped me see things in perspective and is a great help in my thought process, whether it was to succeed for exams or to make final decisions. While we are very adventures, you are right, we rarely take uncalculated risks. There might not actually be back-up plans, but there are always back-up options and alternatives.
As long as we can all be together, healthy, and relatively comfortable, plus surrounded by inspiration (which comes in many forms), not much else matters at the end of the day. Aren’t we all curious about what the Universe has in store for us? 🙂 This year, we will just have to be a tad more patient than other years…
July 17, 2020 at 04:53
I don’t think anyone can really advise if they haven’t experienced your lifestyle. That said, I agree with those who say follow your gut which seems (maybe?) to be telling you not to make big changes right now. One day, one of the alternatives will jump out and just seem right. Then go for it.
July 18, 2020 at 11:59
Thanks, Anabel. Jumping into a new adventure right now doesn’t feel quite right, as you detected. We just have to “fight” that desire for a change in direction and lifestyle a bit longer. While it’s exciting to imagine new experiences and destinations, the status quo isn’t too bad either. I’m enjoying the lack of challenges and the wallowing in comfort right now. 🙂 Don’t tell Mark!
July 18, 2020 at 13:49
My lips are sealed!
July 19, 2020 at 12:59
🙂
July 17, 2020 at 11:55
I do this, too, and I’m not even nomadic! We talk endlessly about where to live, whether that will involve a major move, etc. It doesn’t help that we and our three kids are now in 4 different time zones …
As a few others have suggested, I’d wait until we are a little farther into (and hopefully past) this whole COVID situation before making any drastic changes. We are tempted to jump into new ideas and ways of life, but we think we should take a deep breath and wait a bit. Good luck on your own decision-making!
July 18, 2020 at 12:06
Don’t you find those long, debating, insightful, comparing discussions about (potentially) life-changing events exciting and entertaining, Lexie? I love them. Even when we don’t find a solution, we share the same passion about a new future. And, there’s always what we have and continuing on the existing path when we arrive at an impasse!
It sounds like we’re on the same train of thought as you two – better to wait things out. Unfortunately, it might be a long wait, but the “better safe than sorry” strategy has worked well for us in the past. Having kids in four different directions doesn’t help with your decisions, I’m sure. (Although I wouldn’t recommend moving to New England with its harsh winters.)
July 17, 2020 at 13:07
So many options! My mind is in a whirl just reading about the possibilities. My gut would be to stay in the US with Zesty to see how things play out in the months ahead. Hopefully as the COVID situation improves things will become clearer as to what is the best thing to do.
July 18, 2020 at 12:10
Options are good! Or, they might mess with your mind and decision process. I agree with you, Sue. We should “stay put” (which in our case still means plenty of roaming about) in the US for now. Although, depending on what happens in November, we might have to make a beeline for it anyway… While Covid plays a role in our decisions, there are other factors as well. We will see what happens. At least, none of our choices will be boring. 🙂
July 17, 2020 at 16:14
Because I’ve spent time IRL with you and Mark, I know you both to be grounded, common-sense individuals who are blessed to be able to do what you do, Liesbet! Your monkey-mind is hard at work, I see. One of the reasons you can do what you do is that you don’t have children, otherwise you would be in a place for a while.Once again, you have made choices and enjoy the road to freedom. From someone who is pulling up stakes after 32 years in the same house, the idea of starting over in a new state is quite the adventure in the making. Trust me, I agree with you about the mundane neighborhoods where I walk my dogs. We can’t wait to explore Washington and walk on new paths. 2020 is a weird year for all of us. Many commenters seem to agree to wait it out where you are to get a feel for how things will change. The time is whizzing by and soon you will have made that decision.
July 18, 2020 at 12:24
Good point about the easier decision making when not having children, Terri. But, children, just like dogs, would influence those choices and help restrict them, which is not always a bad thing. Haha. If we would have children, though, we would not live a conventional life either. But, agreed, it would be much harder in terms of flexibility, freedom, and finances.
You and Hans are ready for an incredible new adventure. And such an exciting one. I’ve thought a lot about you both. Part of me (us) would love the idea to become residents in a new state (Utah or Arizona) and make all those trails, parks, and natural wonders our backyard!
Time sure is whizzing by! Every day, I ponder what just happened; it’s bedtime already again! Life is precious no matter where we are, what we do, and what the current situation is. We always have to make the best of it and appreciate the beauty of each day, our health, our relationships, our love, and our connections with people and the world. Have a fantastic weekend, my friend!
July 18, 2020 at 11:43
Liesbet, given the impressive laundry list of life experiences that you and Mark have, I can’t imagine that you need much advice on how to plan an exciting, change-filled life. But, I will say that if I were making major change plans now, the 800 pound gorilla that’s impossible to ignore is COVID – particularly for a plan that involves travel between numerous countries. Whether S America, Europe, Africa, or Asia, each country is going to have different COVID travel and quarantine restrictions, which could change at any moment.
And then, there’s the possibility of getting seriously ill in a place that has sub-standard medical facilities. I’m sure you are considering all this, but the virus is going to be with us for a while, so until a vaccine is developed we’re all going to have to make plans accordingly. Whatever you decide, you two have the experience and flexibility to make it work. All the best. ~James
July 18, 2020 at 12:17
James, thank for you input. You two are the experts when it comes to travel and considering all the pros and cons of exploring the world.
While we have thought about health care and potential illnesses traveling in different countries before, during current conversations about our future, we did actually not think about getting Covid abroad and what we would do about it. Thanks for pointing out that aspect as well.
The options I mention in my post are common thoughts swirling around our heads and conversations. We aren’t ready yet to make any (international) moves, as we agree that would not be wise. Even if we would, the planning stages would take time as well. And, we’re still in MA for two more months, I suspect.
Our main hope is that a vaccine will be developed and available soon. That is, indeed, the only development that would bring brightness to this current situation. I guess the four of us will have to hold tight and put international travel on the back burner. But, as I mentioned before and I know you agree, there is plenty to see and do in this country of ours – perfect for pop-up camper and van explorations. 🙂
July 18, 2020 at 13:21
Liesbet, I’ve had dengue fever twice, and each time I was abroad when I became ill. The first time I was in Belize, and made it back to the US before being hospitalized, and the second time, I made it from Laos to Wellington for my recovery. Being sick abroad really sucks, but being seriously ill and not having good medical care is something else entirely. And with Covid, I’m not paranoid about it, but I’m taking it seriously for sure, and like you, am waiting patiently for a vaccine.
July 19, 2020 at 14:15
Dengue fever is no joke. We’ve had friends who contracted it, but they remained in-country (French Polynesia) to receive treatment and recover (on their boats). Plus, every year, different strands (Zika, Chikungunya…) developed. It was smart of you to repatriate to the US or Australia and be in competent hands. I’m sorry to read how much you suffered from the disease, as its severeness fluctuates.
Mark and I never bought international health insurance. Usually, care is affordable in the places we travel and – if something serious would happen – we’d return to the US. Well, something serious DID happen and returning to the US for a period of time was needed and proved to be the best decision ever. Like you, we understand the risks. 🙂
July 19, 2020 at 14:55
Hi Lisbet
Our zoom group just had a mini dicussion about Bucket lists,,as you have done. Everyone has cabin fever at the moment even if you live in a full house in a big city like Vancouver. Two of my friends from Vancouver. are coming over to Vancouver Island next week to visit small towns here. Do what feels right while you have the energy. People see travel as a recreation but I can see that changing… for a long time. Better to try some non-travel ideas like Donnas 30 hikes in 30 days.
July 20, 2020 at 09:53
Hi Ann! Thank you for your visit here and your two cents. I, too, think that travel will take place closer to home. I like Donna and Richard’s approach of the 30 hikes in 30 days. But, they – and you – are fortunate to be living in a place like Vancouver Island, where nature and trails and peace abound. We are currently in a city and I can tell you, doing the same track with our dog once or twice every day gets old. 🙂 But, we have a camper and that will allow us to explore a bit further afield whenever we are ready to leave Massachusetts. The US is big and has many treasures to discover, still. Have a fabulous week!
July 19, 2020 at 15:05
We love living on the boat and cruising when we can, but we will never buy another boat again! It’s just too much work and money to get the boat fixed up and ready to go. Having a nest home with a garden and pressure water is very appealing, except when you have to work more for more money, which is really not appealing. It’s all such a give and take.
July 20, 2020 at 09:58
Hi Lucy! I had to smile at your comment, “We will never buy another boat again!”. Mark and I had that sentiment, eight years into our cruising journey on Irie. That was five years ago and, mentally, we’re not quite there yet. Yes, boats are a lot of work. The expense was doable, I thought. We averaged US$20,000 a year for everything. Our biggies were insurance ($3,000 a year) and haulouts ($2,000 – $3,000 a year, depending on the amount of projects). We did all the work ourselves, which was challenging and difficult to combine with working full-time and running a business. I know you can relate to that now. 🙂 If we ever buy a boat again – it will be a cat – we don’t want saildrives as that will prevent the annual haulouts. Ideally, we go two years without repainting the bottom, next time around, and we both work part-time. 🙂
July 20, 2020 at 20:29
Life is full of possibiities for sure. South America sounds appealing. But if you’re asking, I’m saying,at this time of the world I wouldn’t be going anywhere. You aren’t the only ones feeling antsy, lol. Stay home. 🙂 x
July 22, 2020 at 12:56
Staying “home” for another couple of months, Debby. We might as well make the best of our situation and make some money. 🙂
July 23, 2020 at 09:36
Glad to hear <3
July 21, 2020 at 14:53
Wow, you’ve had quite the life. I can’t even imagine, but it all sounds fabulous. (Minus the dogs: I’ve definitely become a cat person, partly thanks to my neighbours’ yappy mutts.) I love traveling, but I like having a home base and security to come back to. As adventurous as I think I am, with no security I tend to freak out.
My vote would be for South America. You’ve done the sailing thing; you’ve done what you’re doing now. It’s a new adventure, and a chance to explore new places and try new things. It may be best to stay put until this Covid crisis has resolved somewhat, but then again, unless you’re going to Brazil, the US is one of the worst places to be in terms of risk. (Will they let you in? Canada and Europe are currently closed to US travellers.)
Follow your heart, my friend. What option makes you feel the most enthusiastic and excited?
July 22, 2020 at 13:01
Hi JH!!
What option makes us feel the most enthusiastic and excited? The one you voted for! 🙂
It’s too early to make rash decisions about a new plan and new destination, but the South America idea is the one we hope to pursue within a year or so. By then, they might let us (Mark) in. I can always use my Belgian passport. Lots of logistics to figure out. And, ideally, we get in travel mode again and not feel so exhausted and faced by challenges once back on the road. Swapping vehicles will also take a while and some consideration. We haven’t even seen the pop-up truck camper we have in mind, so not sure it would work. Ha! Time will tell what adventures await! 🙂
July 23, 2020 at 20:35
Hooray! I can’t wait to hear about the new adventures. As for taking time, thanks to Covid, I think slow and surely is everyone’s best bet right now anyway.
July 23, 2020 at 22:29
I can’t wait for new adventures myself, but first, we need a couple more months to be productive and make some money. Almost like a normal life, but in a small room instead of an apartment or house. 🙂
July 25, 2020 at 11:54
I dream of being nomads, I understand that it is not easy, but you inspire!
July 28, 2020 at 16:37
Oh, thank you, Smith! I hope you make the jump to become a nomad one day. What’s life without some extra challenges, right? I dream of returning to Belize one day. 🙂
August 2, 2020 at 16:19
The great thing about these options is that you can have them all. You can keep on doing what you are doing until you are ready for the next. My preference (for me) would be to keep doing what you are doing in the near term and let the right ‘next’ bubble to the top of you list. Of course, I’d love to see you back on the sea. Mexico has lots to explore. Why not head south of the border for a bit?
August 3, 2020 at 09:12
Sound advice, my adventurous friend! I think we are on the same page with this, right now. We will keep traveling in Zesty whenever we leave MA. And, if Mexico lets us in, we might dip south of the border for a bit this winter. I take it you’re on your way to Puerto Penasco soon. Hopefully, the Captain will be able to recover in a boat yard… You might want to soak in the Sea of Cortez’ beauty a while longer. 🙂
August 22, 2020 at 13:19
Liesbet, it is interesting to read about your range of choices and the decision process. I have never been a nomad, but when I travel, I prefer to “go with the gut” rather than having a rigid schedule where we have to be in certain places at certain times. Of course, that’s not always possible when visiting friends and family, because we have to take their timelines into consideration. I have moved quite a bit over my lifetime, renting or owning homes in nine different communities as I pursued schooling and jobs (and in the case of Vancouver, I moved there and left again five times!). In every case, decision making depended quite a bit on my gut feeling for the right choice at a particular time.
Jude
August 23, 2020 at 11:15
Hi Jude!
It sounds like your decision-making progress is pretty similar to ours. We do trust our guts and base most of it on intuition, which is kind of funny as I – always – create lists as well to somehow have the feeling that our decisions are rational. Yet, I usually already know which way my heart points before making these lists. 🙂
You sure have a lot of experience with this, making so many moves and adjustments in your life! Sometimes I wonder whether planning once in a while – especially on the road – would alleviate some of the stress about not finding decent campsites or having to leave quicker than planned. I think it’s a toss-up. Sometimes, reservations might turn into a positive thing, other times, I’m sure we will encounter similar problems than now with the difference that we actually planned and paid for it!